53 – Treating your listener like a co-worker, vocally at least

“Status” determines the power dynamic between you and your listener. In improv, performers consciously play high or low status to shape a scene. In podcasting, we often unconsciously drift into one of two extremes: the “Professor” (high status, talking at the listener) or the “Apologist” (low status, undermining one’s own authority).

The most effective dynamic lies in the middle. Instead of lecturing from above or hedging from below, you should aim to stand beside your listener. Treat them like a peer or co-worker who simply needs information you happen to have figured out. This approach creates “joint attention,” where you look at the topic together rather than performing for them.

In this micro-episode:

  1. How to spot if you are being “too high status” (lecturing) or “too low status” (hedging)
  2. The danger of undermining your own expertise with apologetic language
  3. Why treating your listener like a colleague builds better rapport

Resources:

Episode #21 discusses “joint attention”: https://player.captivate.fm/episode/c61d2113-2fe9-4305-b4e8-27695e6ddefd/

Episode #48 discusses joint attention mechanics: https://player.captivate.fm/episode/024e7de4-896f-4e0a-a45e-5c1373e4a732/

Find more episodes and subscribe at stereoforest.com/minute.

Transcript

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Status can affect the way that we approach and structure and especially the way that we phrase things in our

show. And it's really easy to miss. Improv teaches performers to play status. So we have games and lessons

to teach us how to do so. It determines the power dynamic between our characters and that dynamic can be

subtle or it can be really overt. The status dynamics of the character relationship shapes a lot of the

characters.

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about how a scene plays out and how your character conducts themselves.

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But in solo podcast episodes, in a way, you might play status with your listener.

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And this often carries out in a couple of different ways.

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The first way is taking on the role of professor or lecturer.

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And that can be too high status.

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You might end up kind of lecturing down to the listener.

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Like, let me explain this to you. Or what you need to understand or know is this. It's really just a wording

thing. Like how we do it in improv to do our status battle games, right? You're phrasing it to add that

status. So this phrasing can make the listener talked at. So you're not really having a conversation with

them so much.

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comes on too strong. Now the other way this dynamic can play out is if you're just too low status. So you might

end up doing something like this if you undermine yourself too early on. This could happen with phrases

like I'm not too sure but blah or this might not be all that useful. You don't commit enough to your own ideas

and you're not phrasing things in a way where it seems like you actually even trust your opinion.

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or your knowledge. And this can come across as quite low status. And I catch myself in both of these modes

depending on the show and the topic. I certainly self-deprecate. I think this comes partly from my

Canadian-ness. And when you're really new to a skill, it's easy to find some anxiety about speaking, you

know, in a public space about it. And I also don't like to assume and you kind of generalize a lot of things

because of that. I don't want to make the assumption that everyone knows

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a certain thing and then I do a lot of explainer teachery videos because I used to teach so I go into that mode

and I have to be cautious about that lecture side of things too so where do we want to go with our solo episodes

and connect with our listener more effectively because we're aiming for somewhere in between those

things essentially you know something that they want to know and you're not above them you're just

standing beside that person

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and kind of pointing at that topic together. And you're going on that path together to learn that thing.

I've talked about joint attention a few times on this podcast. I'll add some links in the show notes that

goes into this a bit more. You, as the person instructing, simply have a slight edge from someone else.

You've done the work to figure this thing out. That's why you're online teaching this thing.

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together is going to keep them with you. So imagine that you tell someone you work with about something that

you figured out that you want them to know. This is essentially sharing something useful with a peer

because you both happen to be working on the same project. And this way, that subject doesn't come across as

like a lecture or performative. You don't need to seek permission to talk to them either. And this is a

fairly good idea.

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good status dynamic to shoot for in your videos or your episodes. Your listener is like a co-worker who

simply needs some information and details. I'm Jen deHaan and this Is The Credibility Minute. Find more

episodes and get in touch with me at StereoForest.com slash minute.

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